Honed to Perfection

I recently discovered that I could get my knives sharpened at my local fabric store. Once a week the knife guy sets up shop just inside the entrance and it only costs $2. I've been meaning to get my knives sharpened for some time so I make plans to be at Joann's on Monday.

He looks bored and downright grim. No "Hello, what can I do for you?" In fact he looks surprised to see me. I feel compelled to explain what I'm doing here as I lay the knives on the table. He examines them with a scowl, and I wonder if he's about to turn me away when he says, "These knives look pretty tired."

Yes, they're embarrassingly dull. They've been that way for years. You know how they say a dull knife is more dangerous than a sharp one? Well mine must be lethal because they're about as sharp as spoons. So yes, knife man, go ahead and judge my knives. I've only brought two to see how they turn out, but there's plenty more where these puppies came from.

He takes down my initials and tells me it'll take about 5-10 minutes. I take this as a signal that I should leave instead of hang around. A dangerous proposition. I came in determined not to spend more than $4. Would I have the will power not to buy some small enticing craft item? I pass the time in the needle craft section and discover that Deborah Norville now hawks yarn. And yes, I mean Deborah Norville the TV journalist. There she is right next to Vanna White, the afghan maven.

I hear the sound of the knife sharpening machine winding down. Happily I have managed restraint. No extra purchases today, but as I make my way to the front of the store, I'm vaguely wondering if I'll be charged extra for my tired knives. There is a neat little paper wrapped parcel with my initials waiting. Again, he looks a bit surprised to see me,"L.H.?" I look around. I am the only customer in sight and I was just here 5 minutes ago. "Um, yes that's me." I am happy to find that it still only costs $2 a knife no matter how exhausted your knives are.

After I get them home it's a thrill to discover they slice through tomatoes like butter, and I can't wait to try the big one out on the pineapple. Hallelujah! I sense another awkward encounter with the knife guy in my future.